Marry Me Monday: Blessing of the Hands

Last night, while watching the Bachelorette wedding special I heard the Celtic blessing during the hand fasting ceremony.  The blessing instantly brought tears to my eyes because it was a shorter version of what was read to Ed and me at the end of our Engaged Encounter.  The blessing is a beautiful and moving message that I might incorporate into our wedding but it will definitely be incorporated into our marriage.

Blessing of the Hands
Courtesy of Engaged Encounter of Rochester, NY

Bride please turn and face your groom and hold his hands palms up, where you can see the gift that they are to you.

These are the hands, young and strong and vibrant with love, that hold yours on your wedding day, as he promises to love you all the days of his life.

These are the hands you will place with expectant joy against your stomach, until he too, feels his child stir within your womb.

These are the hands that look so large and clumsy, yet will be so gentle as he holds your baby for the first time.

These are the hands that will work long hours to earn money for you and your family.

These are the hands that will be nicked and bruised from fixing things around the house to make you more comfortable.

These are the hands that will caress your body through the years, to make the passion of love come alive in you.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow and tears of joy.

These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and hold you when fear or grief rack your mind.

These are the hands that will tenderly lift your chin and brush your check as they raise your face to look into his eyes; eyes that are filled completely with his overwhelming love and desire for you.

Groom please face your bride and hold her palms up, so you may see the gift they are to you.

These are the hands hold yours on your wedding day as she gives you her pledge to love you, and accepts your ring.

These are the hands that are smooth and young and carefree now, but will be lined and rougher, working to make you comfortable.

These are the hands that will hold each child in tender love, soothing them through illness, disciplining them when naughty, and wringing themselves in worry when trouble comes.

These are the hands that will hold your face and wipe tears from your eyes in wonder and awe that you would cry for her.

These are the hands that will hold you in joy, excitement and hope each time she tells you that you are to have another child; that together you have created a new life.

Perhaps these are the hands that will comfort you when you are told you cannot have a child, and will convince you that together you will create a new life in other ways.

These are the hands that through the years will caress your body in the passion of love, to enhance your intimacy.

These are the hands that will enter the Sacrament of Matrimony. These four hands will be your armor and shield against the evils and temptations of the world.

These are the hands that will reach out, first to each other, then united, will spread your love and your sacrament to all they touch.

These are the hands that will ease your parents loneliness as you leave the nest, will first teach your own children the marvels of married life, and will be a sign to friends and strangers alike as to just how wonderful married life can be.

Through these four hands, God will renew His Church. These hands are the hope of a troubled humanity. These are the hands that will change the world.

Reverb 12, Prompt 11: Small Pleasures

Prompt Courtesy of sunnysideup

I consider myself a very happy person.  Goldie Hawn once described this type of happiness as having a little giggle inside always just ready to come out.  I got what Goldie was talking about because that is how I feel pretty much every day.    I credit this a lot to having a lot of small pleasures that make up every day for me.  I am very blessed and recognize the small things make up our lives.

In the spirit of the holiday season as well as an attempt to shorten a very long list, I will just list my holiday small pleasures

* Morning Folgers coffee in a gigantic mug that cups just right in my hands

* Being excited about having a special treat like pumpkin bread for breakfast (my current breakfast of choice during the holiday season) see recipe for it here

* Christmas lights

* Christmas music

* Starbucks Christmas themed cup

* A Christmas tree lighting up the room with no other lights on

* A Christmas Story and the 24 hour marathon on TBS

* Hot cocoa, hot cider

* Christmas commercials (weird I know but I love to all of a sudden have holiday music drifting through the house during a commercial)

* The candles on the advent wreath

* Christmas spiritual readings (in daily devotionals)

* My ultimate favorite: tucked away on a quiet cold Sunday afternoon during the holiday season with Christmas music playing and reading a book while sipping something hot and being cozy and warm.

* Christmas office parties

* Christmas candy

*Enjoying a glass of wine after work with Christmas music playing and the tree lit up

*Going to take a coffee shop break in the middle of a shopping trip and getting a cup of coffee with a  holiday treat

*The Square lit up and decorated for Christmas...I get to live in a Christmas village!

 

*Most importantly during the holiday season and every day, my friends and family that God has given me!

Happy Wednesday! :)

Marry Me Monday: Holiday Traditions

I was thinking about holiday traditions as I drove into work this morning listening to Christmas music. My thoughts continued on from my holiday traditions to incorporating Ed's family traditions in our upcoming marriage.  Since the engagement time is not only a time of worrying over the little details of the ceremony, we have had lots of discussions about the real issues of marriage. One of the topics being holidays. We had the opportunity to discuss family traditions, holidays and what is important to us for the celebration of them at our engagement retreat in October. If you have an opportunity to attend an Engaged Encounter weekend, go for it!  You will learn so much about each other from all the discussions.  You are forced to stop for a moment in your busy lives and wedding planning to talk about all types of topics that you may or may not have had a chance to discuss like finances, children, hobbies, and family traditions.

Since we are huge celebration people in my family, we have a lot of traditions.My favorites are ones that we have done for years and probably are very simplistic but mean so much to me.  The top few that come to mind right around Christmas start on Christmas Eve.  My family always goes out to a Christmas Eve breakfast. Being out on Christmas Eve morning is such a special time. People are excited about all the upcoming festivities but since it is still early there is a quiet hush about the morning. 

After breakfast, we always finish up the cooking with a crockpot of hot apple cider simmering all day.  I usually end up drinking several cups and by that evening wine somehow falls into a mug or two.  However, before the wine, we head to Christmas Eve Mass.  We aren't a midnight mass family. We use to be but now prefer the early evening Mass.  Later that evening, I usually fall asleep to the 24 hour non-stop marathon showing of a Christmas Story.

On Christmas morning, I have to wake up at 5am!  I am a little kid when it comes to Christmas but I am not getting up just to tear into presents. There is a peace about Christmas morning that only exists in those couple of hours right before the sun comes up.  We make coffee and open presents to Christmas music playing softly in the background with as few lights on as possible so that the Christmas tree can cast a magical glow in the room.

After we get married, I definitely want to carry on these traditions while also incorporating new ones.  One that Ed always talks about is seafood during Christmas.  His family had seafood dishes a few Christmases and he loved that tradition so we will definitely have to make sure there is a seafood dish or two on the menu. We both love colored lights so our tree will be lit up brightly with multicolored lights and for as long as we can avoid it - no LED lights! They just look so different than the warm glow of the traditional ones.

While we have different ways that our family celebrates the holiday, we have the most important thing in common and that is our love for our families. I am blessed to know in years to come our traditions will revolve around family time as we blend our traditions. 

One of my favorite traditions when I was a child in Jackson, MS.  Still love to see the Cross lighting up the building!

Reverb12: Intention

Prompt from Sunny Side Up

Prompt for December 6: Intention.  What were some of your mantras from 2012 and how did you come by them?  Will they remain the same for the next year – if not, what new ones will you set?

I love inspiring quotes.  I am instantly motivated by a few enlightened words and will jot them down in a moleskin book I carry in my purse.  Sometimes when I am waiting for an appointment or have a few minutes of down time, I will flip through the book and be inspired by words that I had forgot.


Words have always had a lot of power on me.  When I was in the 9th grade, I created a drawing that stayed on our fridge for at least a year.  The masterpiece was one word done in brightly colored bubble letters because bubble letters were the height of artistic talent for me as a 14-year-old girl.  The word was: DETERMINATION.  The picture was a daily reminder for my mother and me to be determined to accomplish our goals, no matter how tough our current challenges were at the time.  We often reflect back to that word and I believe that refrigerator masterpiece still hangs in our minds today.

For the better part of this year, written sloppily on a post it note taped to my computer was the saying: You will become what you think you are.  I read it daily. Now I see it even though it isn't there and think of it daily.  I truly believe in the power of positive thinking. You may call it the secret, a self fulfilling prophecy or faking it until you make it. Whatever the phrase, I believe our thoughts take us to the next step so you better be thinking some great thoughts! 

I don't think it is a magical process but more of an enlightening one. If you are thinking about where you would like to be, you naturally start gravitating to sources that will assist you in getting to that better version of yourself. Likewise, if your thoughts are negative you will naturally attract sources that will nurture the negativity such as negative people.  These thoughts are life draining.  Positive thoughts are life giving.  Positive thinking allows you to create new ideas, learn new skills and surround yourself with supportive people that will help you become you think you are. I will carry this mantra into 2013 as I continue to strive to be the best version of myself. 

Reverb (Day 1 for me): What I Will Leave Behind In 2012

One of my friends, Jen, who happens to inspire me with her dedication to daily writing told me about the Reverb Project.  I had a moment to briefly look over the blog with the information and found the topics to be inspiring as well as the challenge to respond to the prompts given each day by the blogger. As a person who never passes up the opportunity for personal growth and loves a good self help book, I find this challenge fascinating. Hopefully, it will help me as a writer but at the very least it might be some good, free therapy as I explore these topics during the month of December in preparation for a very big year for me: 2013! I don't know if I am going to do this in the manner in which it was intended but I like the challenge and it seems like a good way to get writing inspiration so I am starting the project on Day 5 which is letting go.

My friend posted on her response on her blog, PiercedWonderings, to the prompt found on In the Storm:

What are 13 things your life doesn't need in 2013? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these things change your life?

I am always thinking of ways to add things to my life but never really thought too much about what to remove. I respect eliminating unwanted, toxic, or unnecessary behaviors, items and habits is an important step in creating a full life but I have to admit it is a lot easier to add then to remove sometimes. So this list is a challenge for me and also written in no particular order of importance, just random thoughts.

1. I am leaving behind worrying. I am a huge worrier and a total hypochondriac. I say that lightly but fears often do consume me especially those regarding health issues. To help you understand the level of my hypochondria just know I keep the WebMD symptom checker in business!  I think it is because I have an overactive, overly sensitive mind.  Of course, I should use this busy, sometimes crazy mind of mine for writing not researching random diseases.  So in 2012, I leave behind worry over things that most likely will never happen and I will allow the WebMD symptom checker to finally have a rest.

2. I am leaving behind single life.  I get to marry the man God made just for me in 2013!  I am ready to start this new, exciting (just a tad scary) adventure of married life in April. Bye bye single life, hello married bliss!

3. I will quit using my creative energy for finding excuses of why I can't write and actually write on a daily basis.  So often I put needless, time consuming tasks before my writing and that novel still sits with 53 pages completed. It is time to write the remaining pages to complete the story.

4. Good-bye being lazy and hello exercise! While I have absolutely no desire to be an avid runner or run at all for that matter, I would actually like to be telling the truth when I tell the doctor at check-ups that I walk or do yoga five times a week. 

5. I will eliminate my time invested in time wasters. I have been studying productivity and focus lately.  Although my focus still needs to improve because as I read, I am responding to e-mails, answering the phone and sending an instant message. I am a student of focus, not an expert.  But I realize that all the tiny distractions add up in one's day and by the end of the day, I feel exhausted from a busy day but not productive. I will figure out how to use my time better, if I could just finish that book about focus!

6. Saying good bye to some reality tv will be the hardest for me, probably harder than overcoming hypochondria!  I love my trash tv. I unwind with a glass of wine and hysterically trashy but wealthy, beautiful reality tv stars.  I love it!  However, I watch it mindlessly sometimes and my half read books are evidence of this behavior.  I often leave the television on even when it isn't a show I love and then end up neglecting a book that I want to read.  I need to balance the time between the two....no, I can't give it up completely!

7. Looking over the ideas so far, I think distraction has been a major theme. I am distracted with worry, needless tasks, technology, and tv.  I continue with this theme to say that I will leave behind clutter.  I am a very neat person and most people who know me probably wonder what clutter I am talking about.  Life at work has been very busy this semester so I have neat piles of work that surrounds me all the time. However, I was reading today in the focus book about a clean workspace to assist you in focus. The example the author created seemed so serene that I can't wait to get started on organizing and throwing out unneeded clutter.

8. I would like to create space in my life and mind for more mindfulness.  I guess the opposite of adding mindfulness would be eliminating mindlessness? I admire people who meditate and wish to be one. I think it would help me with my stress and worry. I also think the practice of mindfulness brings on more appreciation in our lives and creates a overall peace in your well being.  Sign me up in 2013!

9. Can I give up creating this list now? I am running out of things to eliminate!  I will say goodbye to negative people and thoughts. No, I won't actually say good bye but I will actively remove myself from negative conversations and limit time spent with these types of people.  Who wants to be negative when only positive actions and thoughts give us energy?

10. Recently, I have become an extremely healthy eater. My eating habits are not for the faint of heart because they are no where near easy. No gluten, sugar, or red meat.  However, for some reason it is not hard for me to eat this way.  I like it. I am becoming a better cook and know more about nutrition and pure ingredients.  But I have got into a rut with making the same dishes over and over. I love cookbooks but they are not meant to be just collectible items on the shelves. Time to use them!

11. I will give up missing Mass.  Before moving to Oxford, I was at Mass every week and for every obligation day. However, the biggest adjustment of moving here has been trying to come to terms with the major differences in the priest here.  He is not what I am accustomed to so it has been a challenge for me but at the same time I love my faith and feel better when I regularly attend Mass.

12. I would love to say good bye to about six inches of my hair!  I am keeping it long for the wedding and right now I am ready to chop it off!  For the majority of my life, I have had and loved my long hair. I think just knowing I want to keep it long for the wedding is making me want to cut it.  I guess it is reverse psychology!

13. Yay for 13!  I almost made it through this list!  And now I am blank. Oh I know - here is a good one!  I will give up saying yes to so much. I love to please others so I said yes when I don't have to and probably do not need to. I have to learn to say no to some things so I can say yes to the most important things that I want in my life.

Marry Me Monday: Pinterest

Pinterest has obviously added a new level to wedding planning.  When I first became engaged, I was so excited to finally have the opportunity to create my wedding board and shamelessly spent hours looking and pinning pictures of wedding inspiration.  But then I realized that all my friends could see all of my ideas and while some ideas I did not mind sharing, others I wanted to keep as a surprise! 

Then a few weeks ago, Pinterest introduced the new function: the private boards. Now I can pin any idea that I want to remember but not worry that all of our wedding surprises will be exposed.  While I don't want to keep everything private because I like when others like or repin my ideas, I do want my Pinterest friends who attend the wedding to have some surprises!