Pregnancy Pounds

I was a chubby kid.  Or soft. Or maybe you can call it baby fat that lasted until I was about 20.  I was told by well meaning people that I could work out more. I always found that interesting because between dancing at a private studio and school, I logged in about 20 hours of dance each week.  However, I ate a lot of sugar and processed foods. A lot. I always dieted. Always. But I could be reverse psychology's case example. Every time I dieted and tried to focus on melting away those pounds, I would add more. Because I am a perfectionist and so when I could not be a perfect (every day) then I just threw the day away and ate (every day).

When I got to college, I continued with the diets. Some worked for awhile like Weight Watchers but I always manage to get off of it and go on a happy binge. After enough diets to qualify me for a nutrition degree, I finally realized a scary thought. Diets don't work. It was a horrifying thought. I was so scared because if I stayed about 15 to 20 pounds overweight while I was so called dieting then what would happen if I don't diet?

After a few attempts of walking away from diets, I found out. I lost all the weight. All of a sudden I realized I can control what I eat for my health.  My health and energy became my focus. I ate less because I focused on what made me full and healthy. Following Dr. Oz's sensible guideline, I avoided sugar and processed foods because diet or not, those foods are just not good for you. In the last year, I gave up gluten because of stomach issues and more weight came off. While some may call this a diet, I don't. I am not obsessed with counting calories or denying myself food. I just focus on what is healthy and portion sizes. Until now.

Enter the world of pregnancy and back comes my perfectionist side. Early in my pregnancy, I read the guidelines of how much weight I should gain which is around 25 pounds. I took it a step further and read how much weight I should gain in the first trimester which is about 1 to 5 pounds. I went a little obsessive and read those online boards where all these skinny mama-to-be's complained about not gaining enough weight or even losing in the first trimester. Then of course they would post some ridiculously low weight that is considered underweight for even a non-pregnant woman. I compared myself. Wrong but I wanted to have the perfect pregnancy. I wanted to gain the perfect amount of weight and be the perfect little pregnant patient for my doctor. Perfectionism sucks.  So what did I do? I ate more than ever.  I started watching that scale every day and getting more anxious. And what happened? I packed more pounds than the recommendation. I was not happy with myself.

Then my mom reminded me that watching a scale and trying to be perfect has always worked the opposite for me. I needed to focus on health. That is all I can control and as long as I am eating healthy then the weight gain will be a healthy weight gain. My advice to all those new mama-to-be's is to do the same. Stay away from the scale. Those numbers only matter to the doctor. If the doctor is concerned, he or she will say something. In the meantime, eat healthy and work out. What a relief it has been for me to come to this realization. Now where is that apple?

Nausea

I can't really complain. The only uncomfortable symptom I have had so far is morning, noon and night nausea. A persistent nausea that causes me to squint my face with a random variety of smells. The once pleasant smells like fresh brewed coffee or the clean smell of laundry detergent can make me gag. I have not been sick and hopefully will not get sick but the nausea can wear on you.

My days for the last several weeks are focused on looking for the next miracle food or drink that will take the nausea away - even if just for a few moments. Unfortunately, this has led me to eating...a lot. And not so healthy choices. Pre-pregnancy I was a health nut and would not touch gluten, red meat or sugar. Now my body craves these foods. Pre-pregnancy, I thought I would manage my weight carefully sticking to my health rules for nutrition. How quickly baby changes things, even when baby has not been born. I have had more sugar in the last few weeks than I have had in the last five years. Not good but it sure tasted amazing! I broke down last week and ate gluten products. I was desperate for relief and a regular cracker sounded so amazing.  The crackers did not let me down. They were my favorite meal last week. While I don't have celiacs, I do have gluten sensitivity so my stomach did not like the crackers but the nausea temporarily went away. To me, that was worth tummy troubles.

Pre-pregnancy I thought nausea would mean you could not eat anything. Not for me, I eat all the time because that is the only time I feel better. I am trying to get back to my healthy ways this week. I bought some crystallized ginger to help with the nausea (will see if that works) but I have to eat better for me and for bundle. Mom picked on me the other day saying I got pregnant as an excuse to eat bread. While I did not want an excuse to eat bread, I enjoyed my food vacation the other day. But all and all, I learned that nothing really conquers the nausea except time. Supposedly it will disappear soon. In the meantime, I take comfort in the nausea being a reminder that bundle is with me.

Oh Baby!

"Don't get excited yet, it's malfunctioning!"  Women who want a baby imagine just how the special moment will unfold.  Women think about how they will tell the soon to be papas. There is a glow to the daydream and all is well.  Well, 5 days after Thanksgiving this year, our special moment came.  Nothing like a daydream or well planned moment but more like a whirlwind that blurred everything.  I have been asked often how did I tell hubby. My first words when I saw the excitement on his face was to not get excited yet because the test was malfunctioning! Not exactly words you daydream about telling in your special moment.  It was perfect.

The test turned from a blank screen to a positive pink plus sign before I could even finish taking the test.  The quick result, not the five minute wait indicated on the package, made me think that the test had malfunctioned.  I asked Ed to come check it because I did not trust my eyes. I looked at him while he saw the test for the first time and witnessed a completely sincere, beautiful reaction. His eyes lit up with excitement and his hand went over his open mouth.We spent the rest of the evening bouncing through a variety of emotions but mainly disbelief and excitement.

Yes, about 8 months into our marriage we found out we are expecting. We were going to wait the standard year before really trying but our little bundle had other plans.  Bundle (short for Bundle of Joy) is scheduled to arrive on August 3rd, a day after Ed's 40th birthday. I have been telling Ed that I wanted to give him something special for his 40th...mission accomplished!  He is so excited that he hopes Bundle arrives on his birthday.  For some reason, I believe Bundle will come a few days early but we will see.

Last year you joined me on the journey to marriage and the first few months of marriage. Now the conversation continues. A conversation that I promise to be better at updating (last semester was just crazy busy).  In the coming months, I will be continuing to blog about marriage because  we are still newlyweds!  I will also be talking about pregnancy and sharing as many details as (comfortably) possible. And of course as a Modern Day Southern Belle there will always be stories of the South.  I hope you will join me in this next journey of my life!