We headed further south to Orange Beach, Alabama this past Friday. For six days, the condo doors greeted a total of 16 people. Some stayed longer than others but all of us shared the common bond of being lost in laughter and fun. We danced and cooked. We ate and drank...then drank a little bit more, especially the day of our para sailing adventure.
Floating around in the bay known as Old River on the second afternoon, Andrew, Ed and I decided we were going para sailing. We greeted my cousin Jimmy later that day with the information that he would be going with us. The three of us were excited. Jimmy, however, asked for adult diapers or possibly some anti-anxiety meds. Yet as the day got closer, Jimmy got braver and I got a little more worried. Andrew only made my fears worse as he talked about how you could see for miles because you were at least 100 feet in the air. He would happily make this whoosh sound and quickly push his hand up to indicate how fast you were propelled up.The mental visual of a piece of fabric jerking me up 100 feet in mere seconds made me just a tad bit more worried. Maybe I should go with Jimmy for the diaper fitting I thought.
I tried to console myself by asking what I always thought, "You get a signal to give to the boat if you want to come down right?"
"Nope, " my cousin Andrew said smiling. He was enjoying picking on my fear and my animated personality only encouraged him more.
What I didn't tell anyone, although probably evident in my face, was that I was wondering if a perfectly healthy 32-year-old belle could have a heart attack and die from panic. A ridiculous worry, I know, but all of a sudden this activity wasn't sounding so good. Sitting on the beach with a cold, fruity drink melting in my hand sounded a lot better. After all, hadn't I come down to relax and be lazy? Unfortunately, I had talked the big, tough talk with the guys so if they weren't backing out then I wasn't either.
The para sailing adventure day arrived. We were doing our morning routine of sitting outside drinking coffee watching the beach and the occasional porpoise sighting when we saw the first para sailor take flight. I was so grateful to witness one before I whooshed myself up into the sky. I was relieved to see the ascension into the air was not too fast. No whooshing sound heard. However, she was wildly kicking her legs as the parachute lifted her up. At the distance that I watched from, I couldn't tell if her wild flailing was out of fear or if she was just doing her morning bicycle exercises. Either way, the jerky body movement wasn't terribly comforting.
Watching her, Andrew confirmed he was just joking about being catapulted into the sky...sort of. Ed comforted me by telling me it wasn't really 100 feet. I chose to believe my sweet boyfriend even though he had never been para sailing himself. Andrew, who had been before, compared the height to a six story building. I thought I can do that - I have been on the sixth floor of a building before.
"Well maybe more like a 7 story building or possibly an 8....", Andrew who just didn't want to give up the fun torture kept adding more every chance he got. An hour later we were up to a potential height of at least 9 stories.
Ignoring my fear, I made my mind up to go so I started the necessary para sailing preparations which included the mandatory mimosa. A mimosa by the pool can ease anxiety and cure a lot of ailments. However, the mimosas didn't work as quickly as I needed. Therefore as the time got closer, I begin to relish the potential last moments with my family as the reality of what I was about to do hit. Maybe I am being a little dramatic but you need to understand my level of fear!
Did you know that you can see sharks and all kinds of sea creatures from the air? Sounds cool. But what if, just what if, that little rope snaps and you go diving into that pretty blue ocean to join your new shark friends? Not so cool. Oh and yes that little rope can break because Andrew's favorite para sailing story revolves around the rope breaking. Ten years ago the rope snapped causing the para sailor to take off on the not-so-joy ride of his life. Or at least on a ride across the highway into a condominium building. Thankfully the free sailor lived but I didn't want to find out if I had the same level of maneuvering skills if my rope snapped. However, Andrew assured me every time he told the story that it was perfectly safe. Nothing bad ever happens...except that one time. Oh...but you do have to sign a release.
Sharks, breaking ropes, panic attacks, unattractive adult diapers....I was trying to remember why I had ever wanted to do this para sailing thing. I am not an adrenaline seeker. I have no desire to go sky diving. I like how my boyfriend puts it, "Why jump out of a perfectly good airplane?" I don't like roller coasters and I would never entertain the idea of jumping off a cliff tied to a rubber band that would hopefully snap me back up in the very last second. But para sailing above water had always seemed safe and fun. I thought it would be like water tubing but in the air. All my nice thoughts were fine in my head until I actually faced the flying activity.
One o'clock approached signaling one hour until take off and bravery kicked in....or maybe it was just the mimosas finally working. I decided that I would just do it and I was going to love it. So I was ready and completely psyched about it. We piled into the car and drove to the Flora Bama to take off but not before the necessary pre-flight "milkshake." The people around this area call their milkshakes Bushwhackers for some reason. We had one of the local milkshakes and by the time we walked out on the beach, I was ready to go. We had several of our new found Flora Bama friends standing along the walk cheering us on and building the excitement. I felt like an astronaut walking to the ship for our mission. All four of us walking down the walk in a slow, stoic pace as our supporters cheered us on. Well maybe they were just a bunch of drunks yelling but if you listened just right it sounded like an adoring crowd. Then we reached the end of the walk as the cheers faded in the background and approached the para sailing window to find it.....closed.
What??? All that worry and excitement and fear and cheering and they were closed?!?! I had spent all day gearing up for my amazing trip that would result in an equally amazing story that would be embellished over the next ten years and they were closed?!?! We found the guy that worked there but all he could do that day was rent us jet skis. They only offered para sailing a few days of the week due to slow business. The business down the street was closed that day because the water conditions were not ideal. So para sailing was not an option.
We rented the jet skis and had a great time but all were disappointed about missing out on the para sailing adventure. I am ready to go for next time which could be as soon as August. Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately), I did find out the real details from the guy renting us the jet skis. The facts include that they don't send you up 100 feet. They actually send you up more like 400 feet. Far scarier! But you don't have to endure fear of death from a panic attack very long. I originally was told that you stay up about 30 minutes but you really only stay up 8 minutes. I can deal with anything 8 minutes. To make me feel even better, I read somewhere that the age minimum is five. Surely if they will send a five-year-old up in the air, I can handle it. Guess I will get to find out in August because I will be ready...just let me have one of those local milkshakes first...
THE PARA-SAILING CREW
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| Andrew, Experienced Para-Sailor |
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| Ed, My Co-Captain and My Love |
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| Jimmy, Fellow Para-Worrier |
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| Me |
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